And The Winner Is...

All Eyes Are On This Prize

We interrupt this regularly-scheduled bitch session about DC United and U.S. Soccer to bring you another kind of football, one which Walsh and I are almost as passionate about (and maybe even more so, depending on the success of our fantasy teams).

So, although this is normally a soccer blog, we like to go off script from time to time and talk other sports...because we're cocky and think we know just as much about other sports as we do about soccer...and also because we've run out of things to say about DC United after they were shutout...again...at home...for the 15th time this season overall...and had no shots on goal. Makes ya' all warm and fuzzy, don't it?

Moving on, I'm going to take a stab at this year's NFL picks, and Walsh will check back in later in the week once his heart restarts after the drama in the Maryland/Navy game yesterday.

So here we go; projections in order of predicted finish and record, with playoff fixtures at the end:

AFC East

N.Y. Jets (12-4) - The odds-on favorite to win the big trophy up above (they were 8-1 in Vegas right before I left). I'm just wondering if all of the preseason hype, attention from HBO, and the rest of the media will make them buckle under the pressure...

New England (10-6) - This might be the Pats' last chance to make a run at the title. They are old on defense, Randy Moss is unhappy, and Tom Brady's hair makes him look like Topher Grace from "That 70's Show."

Miami (9-7) - I think they could win the division almost anywhere else, but 4 games against the Pats and Jets will be their undoing. Chad Henne is going to have a breakout year, though.

Buffalo (2-14) - Might wind up being the worst team in football this year. No QB, bad defense, and multiple running backs but only 1 football to share between them (tip: trade Marshawn Lynch for a bag of footballs if you have to; just get him out of town).

AFC South

Indianapolis (11-5) - Peyton Manning has the weapons to throw for 5,000 yards, but the streak of 12-win seasons will come to a close due to a tough schedule and the fact that everyone seems to be gunning for them, particularly because of the team right on their heels.

Houston (10-6) - Matt Schaub is a legitimate NFL star now, has the best WR in the game in Andre Johnson, and if Arian "The White Supremacist" Foster doesn't fumble the ball as much as Steve Slaton, the Texans have just enough defense to squeak out a wild card spot.

Tennessee (8-8) - I don't trust Vince Young to be consistent for a whole year. Plus, Chris "breaking the rushing record is bigger to me than winning a Super Bowl" Johnson and his act might wear thin in the locker room.

Jacksonville (6-10) - Lots of Jaguar fans thought Coach Jack Del Rio should have been canned last year. He will be after this season. For all of the talk about him being a "shutdown corner," Rasheed Mathis actually led the league last year in td catches thrown against him...oops...

AFC North

Baltimore (10-6) - All four of these teams, even Cleveland, will take turns beating each other up. At the end of the day, it'll be the Ravens as the division winner.

Cincinnati (9-7) - Raise your hands if you think all of the love between Ocho, T.O., and Palmer will last the entire season. Right, and I've got some oceanfront property in Nevada to sell you.

Pittsburgh (9-7) - They will be 1-3 by the time Big Ben gets back. Not an insurmountable problem but one that will be have them playing in "catch up" mode all season. It's tough to sustain that week in and week out.

Cleveland (5-11) - The 1st season for Mike Holmgren will be tough, but he's got some young talent to (hopefully) build upon.

AFC West

San Diego (11-5) - Ryan Matthews could be a stud as a rookie, and Darren Sproles will have a bigger role in the offense than people think. The defense is iffy and when they get into the playoffs, they might want to bring in a new kicker...

Kansas City (7-9) - A few more weapons in KC, and Jamaal Charles is poised to be a breakout star. Give this team 1 more year before challenging for the playoffs.

Oakland (6-10) - I'm not sure why all those critics who slammed Jason Campbell in Washington think he's somehow a better QB just because he landed in Oakland...I guess anyone is an upgrade over JaMarcus "I'm a bigger bust than Ryan Leaf" Russell.

Denver (5-11) - I don't think anyone in Denver has an idea how badly their team will play this year. Orton isn't the guy at QB, not tons of talent at the skill positions, and Elvis Dumervil's injury eliminates their pass rush. The chants for Tebow will begin by week 6.

NFC East

Dallas (12-4) - I hate to admit it, but they're good. Really good. Still some question marks if Romo can win a big game in January (the same can be said about Wade Phillips), but there's enough talent on both sides of the ball that they're rated as the co-favorites with the Jets at 8-1 to win it all.

Philadelphia (10-6) - Kevin Kolb is going to be a very good QB. He might struggle at times this year, but he'll make enough plays to put the Eagles in contention to win every week.

N.Y. Giants (9-7) - End of the line for Tom Coughlin, who has some talent, but, like U.S. Soccer coach Bob Bradley, doesn't seem to quite get enough out of the talent that he has (and there's your weekly dig at Bradley)...also, don't the two of them look alike? Seriously, look 'em up and tell me I'm wrong...

Washington (7-9) - Gotta give Shanahan and Allen another year before becoming a playoff team. Still have to jettison some dead weight (insert Haynesworth joke here), and upgrade the WR position to help McNabb.

NFC South

New Orleans (12-4) - Sean Payton won't let them rest on their laurels this year, but they'll find out quickly how hard it is to repeat as champions.

Atlanta (10-6) - After a disappointing 2009 season, Matt Ryan looks to make the jump into the elite of the QB's in the NFL. A healthy Michael Turner will help him do just that.

Carolina (8-8) - John Fox is considered one of the best coaches in the league, according to his peers. Unfortunately, that doesn't translate to his own locker room. Some of the blame should be directed at the front office, who have made some questionable personnel moves the past few seasons.

Tampa Bay (5-11) - Will be better than last year but not by much. So much youth on offense that you just can't trust them yet to produce big numbers to break a game open, or close one out when it's tight in the 4th.

NFC North

Green Bay (12-4) - The defense has some issues. There's plenty of potential but some aren't living up to theirs. The offense, however, will score so many points that it won't matter much of the time. Aaron Rodgers will challenge for the single-season passing yardage record.

Minnesota (10-6) - Let's see how Favre does with Bernad Berrian as his #1 WR instead of Rice, who pretty much screwed his team over by not having surgery that was recommended to him by multiple physicians in the off-season. You think defenses are going to tee off on Favre this year? Over/under on games he plays? Let's go with 12.

Chicago (7-9) - Just wondering when was the last time the genius known as Mike Martz actually had an offense that was potent? Go ahead, I'm waiting... this team spent lots of money to bring in players who won't even be full-time starters.

Detroit (5-11) - They were a laughingstock 2 years ago but are on the verge of being a decent team. Jahvid Best might wind up having a better season than Matthews in San Diego, and Ndamukong Suh looks like he's the real-life version of The Incredible Hulk. "Suh is angry!!! Suh SMASH!!!!"

NFC West

San Francisco (10-6) - Still a year away from being really good, but the great thing about playing in a weak division is that you can get 5 or 6 of your wins just by playing in it. Some genuine weapons on offense now and some big hitters on defense makes them the team nobody wants to play.

Arizona (8-8) - Derek Anderson will not catch lightning in a bottle the way Kurt Warner did the past 3 years, and Larry Fitzgerald's fantasy numbers will suffer because of it. And that defense might not yet have recovered from their annihilation in 2 playoff games last year.

Seattle (6-10) - Pete Carroll will realize all-too quickly he doesn't have a monopoly on talent in the NFL the way he did at USC. Not enough playmakers on either side of the ball to do much this year.

St. Louis (3-13) - It's going to take them another 2 years before they even BEGIN to think playoffs. Can anybody catch the ball? Does Steven Jackson have another superhuman effort in him to last the whole season? Can the secondary cover anybody? The answer to all these questions is a resounding "No!"

AFC Playoffs

Indianapolis over New England and Houston over Baltimore

N.Y. Jets over Houston and Indy over San Diego

Jets over Colts

NFC Playoffs

New Orleans over Minnesota

San Francisco over Philadelphia

Green Bay over San Francisco

New Orleans over Dallas

Green Bay over New Orleans

Super Bowl XLV

Green Bay over N.Y. Jets

I reserve the right to change my picks once it appears that I have done poorly.

Phew, this was a long column...almost as long-winded as some of Walsh's. Thanks as always for reading and we'll see you again soon!