Skipping Ahead

Italy didn't go to 11...

We're back for day 2 of our game-by-game perfect predictions. We do know the alphabet, but we're saving the U.S.A. Group until Monday. With the corresponding matchups in the second round we skipped Group D as well. So here we go again. Bushman has Group E and Walsh has Group F (once again, the easier group to predict).

Group E - Netherlands, Denmark, Japan, Cameroon

Netherlands vs. Denmark - The winner here has the inside track on 1st place in the group. Denmark is solid all the way around, but the same can be said of Holland...and then they're better in those same spots. The Dutch prove early they're in it to win it with a resounding triumph over the Danes (full disclosure; Walsh and I have money on Holland to win the whole thing. That being said, c'mon, they're pretty damn good this time around).

Netherlands 3 - Denmark 1

Japan vs. Cameroon - Japan has looked pretty bad in their warmup games heading into the tournament. Some say those games don't mean anything, but I disagree; they set the pattern for the tournament. Cameroon comes in as one of the best African teams. I don't buy it, but with Samuel Eto'o, they have enough firepower to probably get past the group stage.

Cameroon 2 - Japan 1

Netherlands vs. Japan - The Dutch pick up right where they left off against Denmark and overwhelm the Japanese. By the 80th minute, Japanese coach Takeshi Okada, who offered to resign before the tournament even started, commits hari-kari rather than fly home in disgrace.

Netherlands 4 - Japan 1

Denmark vs. Cameroon - After the result from earlier in the day, this becomes the most important game in the group stage. The winner probably survives while the loser goes home. Neither team will make things easier on themselves as they fight to a stalemate, setting the stage for a dramatic final day.

Denmark 1 - Cameroon 1

Netherlands vs. Cameroon - Already assured of advancing, will Holland rest their starters or go ahead and make sure they try to win the group? I say they go for it to assure themselves of an easier 2nd round game against a pretty weak 2nd place finisher in Group F. However, if Cameroon plays a defensive game (a draw would ensure that they advance), the Dutch will take their foot off the gas and sub out some of their stars.

Netherlands 0 - Cameroon 0

Denmark vs. Japan - The Danes will go all-out to win and get goals in the hopes that Cameroon loses, then it'll get down to goal differential. They make a valiant effort but are powerless to have an effect on the other game going on simultaneously. Japan just wants to go home and start preparing for 2014, but not without first playing the role of spoiler.

Denmark 1 - Japan 1

Final Group Standings:

Netherlands - 7 pts, +5 goal diff.

Cameroon - 5 pts, + 1 goal diff.

Denmark - 2 pts, -2 goal diff.

Japan - 1 pt, -4 goal diff.

Group F - Italy, Paraguay, New Zealand, Slovakia

Italy vs. Paraguay - Italy has a striker (Giuseppe Rossi) who could be starting in Group C while Paraguay has a striker (Roque Santa Cruz) who couldn't start for Manchester City. Just sayin'. Paraguay plays a defensive style, but there's no way they can match Catenaccio. However, the Italians are notoriously slow starting and Paraguay steals a point here.


Italy 0, Paraguay 0

New Zealand vs. Slovakia - Once again New Zealand heads to South Africa as the weakest team in their group. They just won't get the point they earned last year. Slovakia has enough players to easily dismiss the Kiwis. Hey, at least New Zealand isn't the country that forced Crocodile Dundee and Fosters on us.



Slovakia 2, New Zealand 0


Slovakia vs. Paraguay - This is the match that will determine who goes through in second place behind Italy and have the honor of having their ass kicked by Holland. Paraguay, again with the defensive effort, will do enough to squeak past the lesser half of the former country of Czechoslovakia.

Paraguay 1, Slovakia 0

Italy vs. New Zealand - It's a shame this is the 10 o'clock game and the one above is at 7:30 am on Sunday the 20th. In other words, plan on getting getting all the chores your wife needs done so you can settle in for the Brazil - Ivory Coast game at 2:30 pm that afternoon. I like New Zealand, really I do, just not when it comes to picking them to get a point especially as Italy starts ramping things up.

Italy 3, New Zealand 0

Slovakia vs. Italy - By now the Azzurri should be rolling and Slovakia will show they just aren't up to par with the rest of the European nations. This would have been a great match for Giuseppe Rossi to get a start and make sure an American scored in South Africa. However, he's going to be at the shore in Jersey. (PS: I understand Rossi's decision, but that doesn't mean I'll pass on giving him crap for not being selected.)

Italy 2, Slovakia 0

Paraguay vs. New Zealand - The South Americans finish off the All Whites with a resounding win, but don't win the group thanks to goal differential. Former D.C. United captain Ryan Nelsen adds to his his legend by becoming just the third New Zealand player to score at a World Cup. Pretty sure the other two didn't score as much off the pitch though (Bushman's note: Walsh is right. After DC United games, this guy had a friggin' harem waiting for him when he came out of the locker room...he also nailed a pretty hot journalist who used to work for ESPN; extra credit if you can figure out who it was...)!

Paraguay 3, New Zealand 1



Final Group Standings:

Italy - 7 pts, +5 GD

Paraguay - 7 pts, +3 GD

Slovakia - 3 pts, -1 GD

New Zealand - 0 pts, -7 GD



2nd round matchups are then:


Netherlands vs. Paraguay

Italy vs. Cameroon

Tune in Friday for Groups G and H.


Thanks for reading!